Learning by Trying to Find Love with a Visible Disability

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my continued single status and how I wish it would come to an end. Maybe it’s that we’re nearing the end of another year. Maybe it’s the arrival of another holiday season I will spend single. Maybe it’s the reality that I simply can’t believe I’m still single. Maybe it’s the truth that I feel like things I have always wanted are slipping away with the passage of time. Maybe it’s the understanding that my life isn’t, in this important way, what I ever imagined having. Maybe it’s the frustration that I’m not sure how my single status will end. Maybe it’s the recognition that my single status may never end. Most likely, it’s all of the above that have resulted in me thinking ore about my single status lately than I have for months.

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Missing Emma

It has been more than two months since our beloved Emma left us. Mom and I still talk about our sweetheart every day. Her ashes still sit on the couch, where she loved to sleep. We talk to her when we walk by her favorite bush; the bush she would almost always pretend she was hiding under. Our Emma may be gone. She will never be forgotten.

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Explaining my Daily Struggles for Accessibility

The biggest reason I rarely write about or discuss the inaccessibility I overcome on a daily basis is the fear that my concerns will be blamed on my blindness–not the needless inaccessibility that so often exists.

Another reason I rarely write about or discuss the inaccessibility I must overcome on daily basis is the fear that many will, whether they are aware of it or not, use the struggles I always face as more reasons to dismiss me. Some of you may believe watching me or maybe having to help me overcome so much inaccessibility will detract from your lives. Some of you may find the struggles too frustrating to fully accept me. Some of you, when forced to think about the struggles inaccessibility regularly cause me may have to confront an unfair world your privilege allows you to ignore.

And, of course, there is the possibility that I must acknowledge that by doing this and continuing to publish things like this I will find more support than I realize. I’m not afraid to admit when I’m wrong. Here, being wrong would feel good. Here, being wrong would encourage me to keep sharing things I often keep to myself.

I will now share the daily struggles for accessibility and equality I too often fight alone or nearly alone.

The incidents are in know particular order. I will write them as they come to mined.

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